Last week, I realised that I'd spent almost 500 euro in creative supplies in 2022, which is the equivalent of a new iPad or a return ticket to Stockholm from Paris.
I have so much unnecessary supplies that I often spend more time looking for pastel or watercolour than I spend time using them. After realising that I'd bought the same gouache colour or Caran d'Arche pencil (in France, a Luminance pencil costs between 3 and 4.15 euro) THREE TIMES and hadn't even used them, I decided to sell all unused stock.
After the tenth ad, I asked myself: "why did you buy all that?". The answer came almost naturally: I was looking for the perfect product to do something perfect. The perfect colour, the perfect pencil, the perfect item which was missing and would guarantee the success of my next project.
Long story short: the "next project" never succeeded. After the excitement of novelty, the said item didn't fill its purpose.
The search for the perfect tool or the perfect moment are made of the same cloth: procrastination.
Procrastination is the action of delaying something like getting to work, doing something that needs to be done, not being able to think, waiting for the right time, focusing on something that doesn't matter, creating a portfolio and paying subscription for a website that has never been updated because one's illustrations are never perfect, dreaming of opportunities and never write to an editor or art gallery because one's not self confident enough.
Procrastination is convenient: if I don't do it now, it means that I won't fail yet.
But, no matter what lies behind it, it takes away time and opportunities. It gives more regrets than remorse. It makes you bitter, sad and nips good intentions, success and change in the bud. It works against you and me. Sad, isn't it?
In only 10 minutes, I wrote two emails: one to a gallery and the other to a card maker AND updated by website, all of that surrounded by "Lady Fear", "Lord Perfection " and "Lord Procrastination". I have not received any reply yet but judging by what I can see outside the window, the world hasn't ended yet.
No need to say, I'm terrified. Because I don't know what their reply will be, but also because I took a leap of faith and that's not something I usually do.
But, I've learned to understand that the important thing isn't to have the perfect illustration but rather an illustration that can be seen, understood and that I am able/want to create. It's also all about seizing an opportunity: I've noticed that one of the editors I wanted to contact (hello Emilie!) had subscribed to my newsletter two days prior so, why not email her to say thank you and send her some illustrations too?
And, while I was in this momentum, emailing the gallery was just the right thing to do: I'd sent the first email, why not send another one?
The truth is, when you want to do something, just do it. Do with what you have.
Talk to you in two weeks!
Love,
BC.
PS: I got some feedback from one of the two galleries I emailed: they didn't say that my content was rubbish and that I should be ashamed of myself, but that it was too "young audience" oriented for them. To be continued..."
I can totally relate! I spend my timelooking for a new perfect agenda whereas I have already two or three others I never write in, as I fear to ruin them 🙈 good for you to challenge yourself like this, and fingers crossed for the rest.
Great post Boujou! So true about procrastination. Did you ever read the book by Steven Pressfield, The War of Art? I loved how he described it as a resistance that most creatives face. And of course action takes us out of resistance. I loved this book and had so many aha moments...it still sits on my shelf so I can pop into it at anytime. Think you would love it too! xx 🤗📖